Love Has Come
sharing hope to a hurting world
“For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace.” (Isaiah 9:6)
Hope began when the God of mercy sent His son to earth for us, and we are called to take that love and His light, to a world where wrong seems right.
Studies show more than 85% of parents report at least one child in their home struggles with anxiety and or depression. More and more people feel alone, unseen, and hopeless. Jesus is the only answer for that kind of brokenness and emptiness, but He commanded us to be His love to the broken here on earth.
Stephen ‘Twitch’ Boss, a 40-year-old, successful, talented, wealthy, and handsome family man, with a wife who adored him and children who loved him, committed suicide this week. Could I have softened how I just said that? Maybe. I could possibly have said he took his own life or passed away this week, but instead I intentionally choose these harsh words rather than softening them because suicide is harsh, and the blow cannot be softened, no matter what, when telling someone that their loved one took their own life.
photo purchased from Shutterstock
This was not a man, that by all reports, anyone suspected was hurting. This was a man who made others smile and laugh and was always smiling, laughing, singing, and dancing himself. So what happened? Were there signs no one noticed? Were there questions no one picked up on? Unfortunately, I venture to guess those are questions his loved ones will wrestle with for years.
Suicide is personal to me in that I have family I love who have lived this tragedy. I have family I feel deep concern for who struggle with depression and anxiety. I have friends who have felt the sting of losing a child in this way. Here is what I can tell anyone who gets preachy or condescending when saying they simply cannot fathom how someone could do such an awful, selfish thing: none of us have a guaranteed exemption from the possibility of walking in those shoes one day. Not one of us.
Be careful if you are a stone thrower when it comes to this topic.
photo by DDP @moino007
Perhaps this is a sensitive subject to me because there was a time in my journey where I was so depressed and no one around me had a clue. I too made others laugh, had family and friends who loved me, a good career, from the outside I had a great marriage and home, but in reality it all was terribly broken and crumbling all around me, and all the while I was beaten down and broken inside.
There were years when I was convinced all our problems were my fault and that everyone in my home would be better off without me. I had been so convinced that I was the problem that there were times when I actually begged God to take my life, but I am so humbled and grateful that I am here today, and I know God forgives my inability at the time to see what a gift my life was.
photo by Dmitry Schemelev @enioku
I am grateful that I knew deep down that Love/God had come to this earth for someone as insignificant as even me, and I had a hope for something greater, and that hope always sustained me. I was fortunate to have Godly friends and family who spoke words of hope and encouragement to me. I was fortunate to know about biblical hope, a looking forward in faith, a confident belief based not on what is seen or experienced, but on God’s word and His promises for my future.
That kind of hope is a hope that gives joy, peace and patience in the presence of hurt and pain.
Scripture tells us this life will not be easy. “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” I don’t know if Twitch was a man of faith or not, and I am not saying that anyone who takes their own life cannot possibly be a believer. I, in no way, believe suicide is a simple decision. It is a very complex matter, and I am not a mental health counselor. So, I won’t pretend I have all the answers.
What I can say, is that we are living in some very trying and difficult days. The isolation during Covid, the loss of loved ones during the pandemic, the closing of our churches and the breakdown of many churches and the faith of people, the political division in our world, the lockdowns, the school closings which caused serious learning loss, the unhealthy inundation and isolation of social media, inflation, the list goes on and on…There is a heaviness, and sense of hopelessness today that I don’t believe I have ever experienced in my lifetime. I hear about it from practically everyone I talk to of late, especially when speaking to the youth of today.
People look like they are moving on, moving forward. BUT…People are hurting. People are depressed and hopeless. People need the Lord. Every single day they are passing us by. Empty people, hurting people, worried and stressed people. We pass people as they are privately going through life in pain, living in fear.
“Every man has his secret sorrows which the world knows not; and often times we call a man cold when he is only sad.”
~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
People need the hope that can only be found in knowing Jesus.
photo by Diana Simumpande @dianasimumpande
For unto us a child is born. God knew we needed so much more than this world could ever give, so He came to us! Do you understand how amazing that is? We can have HOPE because our creator, the perfector of love, Love himself, cares so much about us that He came to us through a babe in a manger!!
Folks that is AMAZING!!
THIS is the message we need to share to a hurting world!
And…as if that isn’t enough, we don’t have to do a darn thing to receive it other than accept Jesus as our Lord and Savior!! It is a gift! “For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast. For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.” (Ephesians 2:8-10 NIV)
THIS is good news! THIS is the news of hope that we should be sharing with EVERYONE!! We cannot assume by outward appearances that people aren’t struggling. We need to be sharing the hope found in that manger every single day, to all people everywhere.
“Don’t leave Jesus in the manger. Don’t remember Him only at Christmas. Instead, learn to walk with Him every day.” ~Billy Graham
Go that next step and share Him with people all throughout your world, in your daily journeys.
Every day they pass me by
I can see it in their eyes
Empty people filled with care
Headed who knows where
On they go through private pain
Living fear to fear
Laughter hides their silent cries
Only Jesus hears
People need the Lord, people need the Lord
At the end of broken dreams, He's the open door
People need the Lord, people need the Lord
When will we realize people need the Lord?
We are called to take His light
To a world where wrong seems right
What could be too great a cost
For sharing life with one who's lost?
Through His love our hearts can feel
All the grief they bear
They must hear the words of life
Only we can share
People need the Lord, people need the Lord
At the end of broken dreams, He's the open door
People need the Lord, people need the Lord
When will we realize that we must give our lives?
For people need the Lord, people need the Lord
Songwriters: Greg Nelson / Phill Mchugh
The holidays can be magical for many, but they can also be a time of severe pain and loneliness for others. Don’t forget to be aware of those who might be hurting and lonely during this time of year.
Take time to stop and make eye contact. The eyes can’t hide what’s inside.
Go deeper than just a superficial, hello, how are you, great!
Invite someone for coffee and really talk.
Let others know you are there for them.
Dont be afraid to ask for help.
Don’t think you are alone. Everyone has their battles.
Know that God is love that is why He came for all of us. Cry out to Him. He thought you were worth dying for. That’s how much He values your life.
If you or someone you know is struggling with depression and or suicidal thoughts, please do not waste time. Reach out for help. DON’T WAIT!
The following are some suggestions for managing and or preventing suicidal thoughts from My Workplace Health.
MANAGING SUICIDAL THOUGHTS
Problem-solve: It is always helpful to think of ways other than suicide that you can solve your problems. First, make a list of all the problems you are dealing within your life. Second, make a list of all the solutions you can think of for those problems. You can ask someone you trust to help you with this. Dealing with 1 or 2 small problems can help to put an end to immediate feelings of suicide. Once you are thinking more clearly, you can tackle other bigger problems. You can find worksheets on Problem-Solving and Healthy Thinking in the Antidepressant Skills Workbook.
Think of reasons for living: Most people who think about suicide want to escape their pain, but they do not always want to die. When you feel low, it’s easy to stay focused on things that are negative and upsetting in your life. This makes it easy to think of suicide as the only option. Start thinking about some reasons you have for living. For example, many people have relationships with loved ones, pets they love, religion, goals, and dreams, or responsibilities to others in their life that give them reasons to live and prevent them from acting on their suicidal thoughts. Think of all of the reasons you have for living. Write them down. Remind yourself of them when you are feeling low.
Remember things that have helped in the past: Many people have had thoughts of suicide before. Think of some of the things that helped you feel better when you faced the same types of problems in the past.
Some examples are: having faith and trust that time always helps; reaching out to friends and family; seeing a professional; going to a support group; following a safety plan; doing something you enjoy; not being alone; keeping a journal; or not drinking or using drugs.
Talk to a trusted friend, family member, or professional: It is important to speak to someone you trust about how you feel. Sometimes just talking about how you feel can help. It is important to be open about all of your thoughts. If you have a suicide plan, it is important to tell someone what your plan is. People often say they are relieved that they shared how they felt with someone. Talking can help you feel less alone.
Do the opposite of how you feel: When you have thoughts of suicide, it can be helpful to do the opposite of how you feel.
For example, when people feel depressed they usually want to be alone. Doing the opposite, for example getting in touch with others, can help with feelings of depression.
7 WAYS TO PREVENT SUICIDAL THOUGHTS
But, what can we do to decrease the chances of feeling suicidal in the future?
Get treatment for mental health problems: It is important to get treatment for depression, anxiety, and alcohol and drug problems. Just seeing your family doctor may not be enough. It can help to see a mental health specialist, such as a psychologist or a psychiatrist. You can get referrals from your doctor or learn how to find a specialist from one of the referral lines listed on the last page. If you are already receiving treatment, speak up if your treatment plan is not working.
Identify high-risk triggers or situations: Think about the situations or factors that increase your feelings of despair and thoughts of suicide. Work to avoid those situations. For example, going to a bar and drinking with friends may increase feelings of depression. If this is a trigger for you, avoid going to a bar or seeing friends who drink.
Self-care: Taking good care of yourself is important to feel better. It is important to do the following:
eat a healthy diet
get some exercise every day
get a good night’s sleep
decrease or stop using alcohol or drugs, as these can make feelings of depression and suicide worse
Follow through with prescribed medications: If you take prescription medications, it is important to make sure you take them as your doctor directed. Speak to your doctor if medications aren’t working or if side effects are causing you problems. If you have just begun taking antidepressants, it is important to know that the symptoms of depression resolve at different rates. Physical symptoms such as energy or sleep may improve first. Improvement in mood may be delayed. Speak to your doctor if you are feeling worse.
Structure and routine: Keep a regular routine as much as possible, even when your feelings seem out of control. Here are some tips for creating structure in your life:
wake up at a regular time
have a regular bedtime
have planned activities in your day, such as going for a walk or going to the gym
continue to go to work or school
Do things you enjoy: When you are feeling very low, do an activity you enjoy. You may find that very few things bring you pleasure. Think of things you used to enjoy doing at times you didn’t feel so depressed or suicidal. Do these things, even if they don’t bring you enjoyment right now. Giving yourself a break from suicidal thoughts can help, even if it’s for a short time.
Think of personal goals: Think of personal goals you have for yourself, or that you’ve had in the past. Some examples are: to read a particular book; travel; get a pet; move to another place; learn a new hobby; volunteer; go back to school; or start a family.
FINAL THOUGHTS
When you’re feeling suicidal it may feel as though it will be impossible to escape those feelings and when they do start to dissipate it may feel as though it will be impossible to prevent the suicidal thoughts from returning in the future. There are many evidence-based methods for both managing and preventing suicidal thoughts.
Check out Dr. Joti Samra’s Coping with Suicidal Thoughts for more resources, information, support, and practical steps to help cope with suicidality. If you or someone you love is at immediate risk reach out to 1-800-SUICIDE (1-800-784-2433) for 24-hour support.
From: My Workplace Health
